The pain of rejection is not limited to a select few; it is intimately personal to all. The loss of relationship on both heart and social levels is heart-rending. We cry out for individuality and the freedom to be ourselves yet we were created to prosper within the bond of relationship. Our Daddy God designed us to be givers and receivers of love. We were created to partner together with Him and others for the advancement of the Kingdom of God. Because of Father’s sovereign design, we are compelled to take emotional risks on a consistent basis. Internally we ask ourselves the questions: “Will I care again?” “Will I risk rejection yet again?” “Will I open my heart to trust all over again?”
Forgiveness and healing is always needed in varying degrees from the pain experienced in seasons of rejection. In these times, if we choose to look through the prospective lens of God’s protection, we will find encouragement in the midst of intense difficulty.
I am convinced that the Father rewrites disappointments and rejection to protect us from something or someone that could sabotage our future.
There are healthy mindsets that we can choose while facing these seasons. This will help to not only lessen the blow of the deep pain of rejection, but also deepen our faith as we look to the one who is far greater than our circumstances.
Healthy Mindset #1: Trusting the Holy Spirit to provide direction for my prophetic purpose.
As you partner with His mastery and love, you will experience the ordering of your steps. My personal belief stands strong knowing that if we genuinely desire to be in God’s perfect will, He will keep us there. It is safe to conclude that the Holy Spirit will redirect our purpose from anything that would sabotage its success.
Let me give you an example. I am by my own admission, “directionally challenged.” I can get lost anywhere! I live in a rural Pennsylvania and was only five minutes from my home when I thought, “I think I’ll take a short cut.” Well, a half-hour later I am still trying to find my way home. So, finally, I solicited help from my GPS and arrived home safely.
In life, often times we can get “lost” as we are lured into negative situations. The Holy Spirit is our internal GPS to get us back on track. We may or may not be consciously aware of His protective intervention, but we must request His help.
It is possible for us to feel intense loyalty to individuals that deliberately or subconsciously pull us out of purpose. This could be regarded as co-dependency, false responsibility, or devaluation. These things repeatedly position us to be taken advantage of through our fear of loss. Now let me pose this thought: Could it be that their rejection of us is actually God’s protection?
There have been a few times in my life where disappointment, rejection, and betrayal pierced my heart with such force that I didn’t know I if could recover or trust again. I learned afterwards that Daddy God not only turned all things around for good, but also separated those individuals from my life who were sabotaging my ability to increase. Hindsight allowed me to objectively observe that their rejection was for my protection. This does not make a person a villain or enemy. The fact is that unhealthy relational practices, mistrust, or dishonor can leave us living to please man rather than God.
The Bible speaks of “hearing through our idol.” Is it possible that we could want something so much that we do not think how its end-goal could ultimately derail our forward momentum? Could our felt-need be stronger in our decision-making than our God-given core values? Oftentimes our disappointment over a missed opportunity, a closed door, or a rejection of a proposal can blind our eyes to see the Holy Spirit’s protection.
I trust the Holy Spirit to provide direction for my prophetic purpose. I have been chosen in you before the foundation of the world! Before creation, you planned and purposed ME! My life is not a mistake. I was born at the perfect time in history with a beautiful purpose to fulfill. There are angels on assignment to work with me to release my reason for being and make provision for my valued contribution to the world. As I partner with your mastery and love, I will experience the ordering of my steps. My belief stands strong knowing that if I genuinely desire to be in your perfect will, you will keep me there.
Healthy Mindset #2: Father God knows what will bring the greatest joy to my life!
The challenge of human nature and comparing ourselves with others can become a place of frustration. Often this discouraged state compels us to step out in our own strength. Daddy God is making provision for our highest and best. He knows what will fulfill the heart and satisfy the soul. Without that reality we position ourselves to try to pursue happiness rather than obedience or self-fulfillment over Kingdom pursuit. We chase what is successful in the eyes of man. We run after the things that appear grand and glorious or we pursue partnerships that hold opposing core values or have a jaded agenda. Though not always the most comfortable in the moment, we can be at peace on the inside when we trust that God is out for our good and wants to see us succeed.
God, I trust that you know what will bring the greatest joy to my life. Help me not to walk in comparison, but to see clearly the plan that you have for my unique life. I believe that you are making provision for my highest and best. I am confident that you know what will fulfill my heart and satisfy my soul. I choose to chase you above all else. I find true success by following your word. I rest in your purposes for my life and ask you to teach me to guard my heart so that it would never waiver in my pursuit of Kingdom destiny.
Healthy Mindset #3: Seeking first the Kingdom of God is the place of safety, provision, and protection!
Heaven’s reality is the foundational grid through which all our decisions should be made. In order to say “yes” to opportunities and people’s requests, we need to submit it through the integrity of God’s Word. We must ask “Will this decision advance the Kingdom of God?” As well as noting how it will empower us to walk out the unique contribution we are designed to release to our world.
Living life in fear of disapproval and rejection is a snare for our soul and a saboteur to our purpose. If we are not celebrated for the gift within us, then their rejection is our protection. If we are given the cold shoulder or excluded in certain circles, then their rejection is protection.
Lord, I seek first your Kingdom and righteousness. You are my place of safety, provision, and protection! Teach me to see things like you do. I ask for Holy Spirit’s counsel as I make decisions and navigate relationships. I want my life to be used for the advancement of your purposes. Thank you, God, for creating me with a unique purpose to fulfill. I refuse to live in fear of disapproval or rejection as I walk out the good life that you have planned for me. Help me to join with those who will celebrate who you have called me to be and give me grace and strategies for releasing or redefining the roles of those who do not.
Healthy Mindset #4: Kingdom connections, relationships, and opportunities are a gift from God!
Enjoying holy alliances at the appointed time opens heaven for each person involved! Mutually empowering, celebrating, and honoring covenantal relationships are gifts that activate purpose and bring life to our soul! Being faithful to the platforms of influence the Holy Spirit gives is a place of supernatural grace—divine enablement—that builds the Kingdom and increases authority!
When our response is “yes” to truth, we are saying “no” to that which would deceive. If my “yes” to heaven gives people the reason to reject or attack me, then rejection is protection.
Father God, I ask you to join me together with the people and opportunities that are beneficial for my life. Open my eyes to see where I am walking with jaded eyes in areas that would ultimately sabotage me. Help me to be a person who is a life-giver and surround me with those who would mutually sow life into my life. I choose to say YES to truth and by doing so, I trust you to rid my heart and mind of that which would deceive me. Thank you, Lord, for your protection in every area of my life. I trust you completely.
No more games! No more compromise! No more walking on eggshells! No more fear-based decision-making! Let us run the race with patience, not swerved from our deliberate purpose! The Kingdom of God is forcefully advancing, let us partner with the rule and reign of God!
Dr. Melodye Hilton